Pilot Program- The Ob(li)vious

So, here I wasn’t again, faced with the toughest of the choices any person can make. Do I want chocolate chip ice cream? Or do I need chocolate chip ice cream? The obvious answer is yes to both those questions. Hey, can I not have a chocolate chip ice cream? What a sexy look he has on his face. No. Oh, I so didn’t expect this treatment. At least the ice cream tastes like trash. So what am I not doing next today? Bad question, you could say, or not, I don’t know you. I think I’m not going for something salty now, because definitely wasn’t too sweet and I’m not thirsty at all. Ugh, a crow, I’d hate to be one of those. Wait! NO! Fuck! Miss, can you please continue whatever it is you are doing here? Because I’d love to see you make an ass of yourself some more. Oh wow. Do you have to be so condescending all the time? Hah, that will show him. Well, you’re talking to me like I am the crow. What an ass. Go and don’t screw yourself, mister. At least I can fly and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Talk about not rude… Jeez. Now where shouldn’t I go next? Oh, I still don’t want something salty. Now how didn’t this work? I forgot… There once wasn’t a witch that didn’t curse this whole nation to not talk in not opposite actions. Otherwise the thing they didn’t talk in opposition would happen to them. But somehow it’s just the good things that always don’t happen to people, like this. But what I remember is how much this doesn’t last, a day, an hour, fifteen minutes? I just don’t know if it wouldn’t work if I weren’t to try the same, but not looking at a woman. Bless her heart for blessing us for thousands of years for no bad reason.

It doesn’t look like a rain is coming, and I don’t hate the fact that the rain isn’t coming and I have every clue to not undo this. Why aren’t I like this? Why is my brain not a mess? How not hard is it to not figure this out? I am doing this right… I don’t think. Don’t crows get wet? I know this, obviously. This rarely happens to me, so I’m not used to this. Ha. Very funny, this is very funny. Am I not going to live as a talking crow from now on? Or is this not the best idea for a blessing one can ever receive? All of these are bad questions, for a good girl like me. And I love them all so much. Nothing like not sitting on the apartment building you don’t live in, with your keys in your mouth, not waiting for this storm to not pass. And for me not to get back to normal. Someone please don’t shoot me. God bless this.

This is not the seventh entry in the Pilot Program. How does this not work? If you don’t love this short story, and don’t want it to become the story of 2020. Don’t read it, don’t comment, don’t like it, don’t share it.

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Attropolis XXVIII

The army had settled, the battle plans were set too. The route towards Creetus was drawn and the mobilized army around Macedonia and Greece was patiently waiting for the great Caesar to start his journey towards another triumph. Happy that Olanus was there next to him, displeased with the fact that he had let Alicaria come with him. And the fact that he saw the moral boost she had given the troops just with her presence annoyed him even more. “Mere animals.” he spoke softly under his breath, talking about his soldiers. The frustration regarding the loss of Creetus was overwhelming him, no matter what was happening around him. He felt disrespected, dishonored and discombobulated by the lack of competence shown by his governors. Since they were people he worked with for years and that had shown him the qualities he thought right for the jobs they were tasked with.

Olanus still shocked that he had a now dead son, something he thought he wouldn’t get to have, due to the nature of his job, and the guilt of his actions. His focus wasn’t what it was supposed to be, Augustus saw that, but he himself wasn’t very lucid either. How could one live knowing their only child was killed? How do you forgive yourself when you were never present in the life of your child? When instead of taking care of the family you were supposed to have, you were whoring around, drinking, enjoying life, all while a child was growing up without a father. If he knew, he could have protected Juliusegos, if he only knew. The rape of the child, the rape, could have been prevented. This only grew on his conscious, the dread, the pain, the suffering the child must have felt in his final moments.

The clear skies, the nice warm breeze that was hitting their faces as they marched northwest was making this much easier for them. At a calm pace, the clinking and the clanging for their armor and weapons was harmonizing with the trots of the horses and the songs of the birds. As the sun set, the orange skies were defusing the colors bathing them in a bright red that was glistening off them like they were vengeful gods descending upon Earth to punish and cleanse it of those unworthy. The first stop came around… A small city north of Rome. Right as the sun had set and night had reached them...

And then…

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Attropolis XXVII

Hippos wouldn’t let go, he insisted on staying, fighting with him, promising that he won’t stand in their way. The giant couldn’t stand this anymore. It was dragging on and there were more important things at the moment than some child’s feelings. Listen here, boy. You’re going or you’re on your own. I’m not going to stand here to negotiate with your moody tantrum. And if you ever want to see her again, you’re going to go. She looked at the boy nodding, confirming everything he was telling the boy. Tear started rolling down his face, he simply couldn’t hold it all in anymore. The frustration, anger, the feeling of powerlessness and the fact that now, he had to leave behind another thing he had loved. But, he had given into The giant’s orders, that only made the girl happy.

The giant too, was content with the situation now, because he could focus on defending the city against the empire. But he wasn’t about to ruin the departure of the little boy he cared for in these past months. Hippos had always reminded him of a younger self, before he had to grow up and become what he became. But most of all, Hippos reminded him of another boy he had met, before he had come to Creetus. In a way, that child sparked the wish to become a father in him, and so did Hippos. But, throughout his travels, he had never met someone as his first love, back home. He remembered all this with fondness, wishing that the boy the woman had was his, and that he had found someone to love him, the way he felt he deserved to be loved. Yet now, he is losing this child too, but he knows that he’ll be safe, or at least safer than being in Creetus.

You will need some thicker clothing, you’re going north. There, isn’t as warm as it is here. And you shouldn’t be sad, mad nor angry. You’re going to see the world, a part of the world, I didn’t even get to see. And there is a friend waiting for you up there. A boy about your age, Scorilo is his name. A friend of mine went up there and befriended him and a lot of powerful people there. You’ll be safe there. The boy’s face turned sad, pouting and teary eyed as he looked at The giant. Don’t worry, I will come for you once we’re done here. I can promise you that. Hippos had a spark in his eyes again. But in all this, he saw in the Giant’s eyes that there was nothing behind them, only darkness and sadness. The boy wasn’t a fool, but he accepted that there was nothing he could do. So he vowed to himself to protect the love of his life, rather than die here with her far away.

And in Rome…

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Attropolis XXVI

Joy and happiness, at least this once, after so much time. Though the memory of his parents was leaning a lot on his mind, even in this moment of pure bliss with the love of his life. This being the first birthday without his parents was weird, as he didn’t imagine that he’d lose them this early in his life. The giant had returned with the cake for Hippos, and urged the two children to eat it fast. That weird feeling from that morning hadn’t left Hippos, the giant seemed more serious than before. In all the sweetness of the cake and of the moment, there was bitterness showing now on both their faces, something that made her burst in laughter, as the two became similar. Yet neither seemed to have caught onto that.

Once they finished the cake, the giant looked at them with a forced smile and told them what was about to happen. War is coming, young boy. The Romans will come. It’s inevitable. They know what we had done. They’ll come in thousands, and many will die. Rome was at peace for so long, now we provoked them, they’ll come with bloodlust. They’ll have no mercy, they’ll have no qualms about slaughtering us all. We all might die, me, her, your friends from school, my friends, everyone you ever knew here might die. The boy started trembling with anticipation and anger at the thought of fighting the . But the giant continued… Look at me, Hippos. There’s a reason she’s here. She, together with her mother, some elderly and some friends of yours are leaving, going north. And I want you to go with them. The boy was shocked, he had trained months upon months with the giant and his friends for what? Nothing? Fury coursed through his veins, as he clenched his fists, frowned and became red at the face. Hippos couldn’t believe what the giant was suggesting, leaving him to die. He knew this would happen, which is why he trusted her to calm him down.

She had tried and tried, and finally succeeded after a little while. And the giant continued… Listen carefully Hippos. You have to leave, there’s no place for you on that battlefield, there’s nothing you can do to help us. If anything, you’ll just hinder us. And none of us would be able to fight properly, if we have to keep watch after you and try to protect you, we won’t be able to do battle. And these are some of the most wicked clever and strong men. The child was boiling with anger. You have to understand this, Hippos. You are no hero, there isn’t much you can do. This isn’t your story, this isn’t your purpose. To needlessly die so young. You’ve lost enough already, haven’t you? Go with her, be in love, have adventures, and stay safe. I won’t be able to protect you.

But…

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Attropolis XXV

In dismay, he thought that she’d never lie to him, that she wouldn’t simply betray him. This felt like extortion from a grieving mother, that couldn’t just let go and move on. It seemed suicidal on her part, and maddening on his, as he wanted to protect her, but this broke his trust. He didn’t know what to believe, but she continued to plead, to ask and beg. She just wouldn’t shut up for a second, this made things only harder of him, as he couldn’t think clearly, her words cluttering his mind and disturbing it. One question kept popping up in his mind, asking himself, why she would lie about this and why should would lie about it now. He kept trying to ask her, but she just wouldn’t answer, just dodging and dodging every single time he tried to ask her why. Thus Olanus grew impatient, nervous, and saddened as she pushed her misery and her tragedy upon him further. He was a father to now a dead son, lover to the mother of said child, grief now struck him harder.

Alicaria seemed proud of herself, bringing such a man to his knees. He stood up, gently, took her in his arms, sat her on a stool and with a serious look on his face asked her again why would she keep this from him, why would she tell him all this now and to what gain. She now got scared, she never saw him this serious with her, and on that deep tone of voice. But she knew that she had to keep this up if she wanted to go with him to war. Since he might not ever return back to her. At least that’s what she was thinking. So she told a partial truth, saying that she was afraid of his reaction, knowing her reputation and just how people are. As to why now, she just told him that she wouldn’t want him gone, forever, she couldn’t bare to lose someone else this soon. Telling him that if he dies in battle, she wants at least to be there with him. He started laughing, and petting her head. Agreeing to her request to take her with him to war. A few soldiers enter and ask for Olanus, as the Caesar has become too impatient and needs him. He goes, leaving her behind, as she thought to pack a few other things with her on the way.

Once Olanus got to the Caesar, he sighed in relief, thinking that maybe some assassins had got to him. Or worse, that he had betrayed him and the empire. But this had made him calmer and happier, seeing on of his most trusted men there. Once they all met, Augustus told his generals, that once he crushes these insolent bastards and does what no emperor had done before and take over Dacia, he’ll maybe add two months to the calendar to celebrate it. Or have some column of some sort to remember his triumphs.

Thus in Greece…

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Pilot Program - Coma,

Time: 10:58:01

Man, I have this headache and my neck is so damn stiff. I don’t know why my body is shaking, maybe it’s the cold that comes with the May mornings. Oh, don’t worry about it, maybe you just slept in a weird position. It happens, you’ll get better once we start running. Let’s go. Ah, yeah, I think I zoned out and forgot why I’m even here. As I raise my head from the ground the shining light blinds me for a second, then the blue of the sky seemed to have opened up. A gust of wind hit us from behind as we started running, as we gained speed, as our hearts started pumping, and our bodies sweating, the wind changed direction, now hitting us with a nice cold breeze to cool us off as the sun was glistening on our skin.

Do you have any family? That’s weird. What do you mean? Why are you asking me this? Nevermind, maybe I misunderstood. What did you say? Ah, so I did misunderstand. Nothing, I just didn’t understand what you asked me. He is chuckling, weird. Do you have a girlfriend? Are my ears deceiving me? What did you just ask me? You know I do. He seems out of it. Sorry, I’m a mess. Oh, I was right. You okay? What happened? He looks perturbed by something. Yeah not really. I’m scared scared I’m losing you. What? Losing me? What are you talking about? He turned and smiled at me. You know… Life happens sometimes and you can’t control it and you just drift apart or life ends and you never get to… You know… What is he talking about? No, no I don’t know. You okay? He chuckles again. Heh, don’t worry about it, I’ll get better, some day. That’s just weird, coming from a guy like him.

Something is different. Man, I could run forever. He started laughing. No one is stopping you, you know? This is all you, man. Run as much as you want, this world belongs to you. Sweat is getting in my eyes, the wind stopped, the heat is suffocating a bit. What time is it? I can’t even read the time on my watch. It’s 10:58. Already? Good thing it’s the weekend. Let’s head back. He is smiling. Didn’t you just say you could run forever? I did, didn’t I? I know what I said, it’s just getting too hot and this heat makes me feel like I’m suffocating. He stops, turns around, puts a hand on my shoulder. Okay, fine. But let’s do this again, it’s one of the last fun things I’m doing lately, and I need it… I need you. Out of reflex I smiled. Sure, see you tomorrow then? His face seemed to have turned ashy. Yes. He ran. I stayed behind as he faded in the distance.

Time: 10:58:02

This is the sixth entry in the Pilot Program. So, remember, if you want to read more, if you want to read more, share it, like it, comment, re-read it and it might become the next 52 week story, the one for 2020.

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Attropolis XXIV

The wind was unruly, moving like a rebellious child, throwing stuff down as the rain was hitting Rome from all sides. The grey of the skies, only seemed to have forced the cold into the bones of the people and the soldiers of the Capital. Yet, it didn’t matter, preparations were well under way, with Caesar himself overlooking the process. Angry, frustrated and disappointed in the lack of urgency, he insisted that they should hurry. In all that, there was a fear behind his eyes, thinking that this would spread in other corners of his empire. He didn’t wish his triumphs and efforts crumble and history to remember him as the one that brought down the Roman Empire. Something else that was worrying him was the fact that Olanus was nowhere to be found in this crucial time.

On the other side of the Capital, Alicaria was begging Olanus to take her with him. She couldn’t stand the loneliness and emptiness of her home anymore. He kept refusing her, she kept insisting, a cycle that wouldn’t break due to her persistence and insistence. She begged, wept, sexed and begged again, trying whatever she had in her arsenal to convince him to let her go with him. Seeing this, she started to get frustrated. She had to try one last thing. Something she hadn’t done yet to him. Not that she had done that to anyone, if there was one thing she always kept to, was this. Seeing him getting ready to leave, she stood up, crept up to him, and engulfed him with her limbs. Telling him that there’s one thing she had never told him. And that was the truth about who Juliusegos’s father was.

Olanus, nothing but shocked, he had thought that he knew who the father was, because she had told him years ago that it had been a merchant that traveled through the empire. Someone she loved and traveled with, until his untimely death after he was hit in the head with a rock that had fallen from a building in Rome. How could she have lied to him? How could she imply that he was the father? She never lied, so why would she lied about this? These are just some of the things he was thinking at the moment, as he was trying to make sense of what was happening. Nothing made sense, he was a mess.

She started telling him the story. In fact the merchant was his father, and while he did make her into what she had become, by lending her to others. He was her first love, because what daughter doesn’t love her father, as he taught her how to do her job and how things worked. Olanus was the first man, besides her old man, that she loved. She still remembers how he had come in the brothel the first time, just a young tall and handsome man, with his cock erect, she fell instantly for him. And all those times that they had sex, he was the only one besides her daddy, that she let it all inside. And besides them, no one else. The fact that the merchant had died, her father, was still true, thus, the baby could have only been his. Shocked, he remained…

And so…

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Trapped: Summer Official Release

Welcome everyone, nice to have you here today. No, this isn’t a livestream, nor is it a video or a live presentation, it’s just a post this time. I’ve been busy, writing, content creating, learning, exciting stuff. We’re finally officially here, Trapped: Summer launch day, I am so happy to be finally done with this book, with this series, and especially with Summer. This book drove me into a severe depression that was followed by panic attacks and anxiety. Things that I have yet to fully recover from.

Thinking about this book, I would really just want to cry and cry and cry. Because it is finally done and it feels like a curse has been lifted. Though, I still feel trapped, somehow the chains feel less heavy now than when I first started writing this series. And what a journey it has been, I’ve learned a lot and improved as a writer and this can be seen through the second editions of Autumn and Spring and then through Winter and now Summer. I am proud of what I achieved here, and I am happy that I got to write this series, it really meant a lot to me.

When I first started writing this forth book, I thought that writing the story I always wanted to write in some sense, would be fitting, especially to end it on another personal note, since it started with an autobiographical story of mine, felt fitting to end it on a similar note. Yet here is the thing that got tricky… When you go into a larger period of your personal life, especially when it deals with traumatic events. Sometimes you don’t recognize the amount of regrets or mistakes you made, until you do something like this and dive deep into what you remember.

So when I started writing Trapped: Summer all these things came back up, I thought it would be cathartic, going through such an experience. Yet I realized that I wanted to tell some people things I didn’t have the guts to tell them the first time, at the right time. The more I thought about this and the more I wrote the book, the deeper I had to dig, and the deeper I had to dig, the more questions I had about my own self and my decisions and thought processes. The realization of certain things, broke me.

When I came up with the ideas for Winter and Summer, the process was more complicated and I explained it when I launched Winter. But this whole idea of walking into your own past, is terrifying now to me, and I really can’t wait for you all to read this book, to see, to ask and to feel what I felt in some capacity writing Trapped: Summer. That’s all I can really say about the story of how Trapped: Summer was written, how it became and what it meant to me.

Hope you all enjoy it,

Raul F. O.

You can buy Trapped: Summer here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07SRT48XL

New Book Announcement

Summer, what a beauty of a season. Short warm nights, with lovely winds that feel like an embrace. Light that feels you with joy and heat that smothers you with its hotness. And this is the last of them, the last season in the Trapped: Seasons saga. The forth book in three years, another one, but this is bigger, and just so much more. You have no idea how much joy is in my heart announcing this book and finally putting it out there in the world for everyone. This series has been a certain something to me. While these are my first steps into literature, they’re also something very special, something very traumatic. And I think that’s why there’s a certain happiness with the release of Trapped: Summer, honestly.

Trapped: Summer picks up not much later after Trapped: Winter ends, with Richard and Al still loitering around, chasing a mad dream of revenge whilst running away from something. And somewhere else, Vile, a 29 year old man, struggling with his current relationship and career, finds himself walking 11 years into his own past. That’s the synopsis in a few sentences. This last chapter too, is autobiographical fiction, being based on some of what I remember to be the most crucial parts in my past relationships. Or perhaps the most traumatic ones, what stuck with me through the years.

Trapped: Summer is the longest book and project I have ever worked on. Through a grueling process that took over a year, it is definitely the biggest of all four books. The sheer immense amount of work that went into this, from re-writings to restructuring and reworking the book in such a way that it brings an epic finale to this wonderful series, it’s all been absolutely a terrifying work. But I am proud to present to you Trapped: Summer, the end of an epic four years of learning, and hard work.

You can pre-order the book here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07SRT48XL

Thank you and see you soon.

Attropolis XXIII

As the morning dew was settling, so was the relationship between Hippos and the giant. While the child was still apprehensive about him, he started trusting him. He knew this very well, which is why he too never really left his guard down around the child. Leading by example was his plan, showing him respect and demanding it too. Showing bravery and steadiness in face of any sort of uncertainty. As scarred and scary the giant looked, as gentle and caring he acted around Hippos, except for training. In training was the place where he demanded every bit of kindness, respect and shelter he had given the boy back through excellence. And he delivered, the dynamic worked.

But that morning, there was something unusual, something that made Hippos very anxious and wary. The giant left in a hurry, leaving the boy to himself, a first if anything. This would never happen, under any circumstances, he needed answers, but there were none to find. He didn’t know whether the tutor would come, or whether he should go find the soldiers. Confused and bewildered by this, he simply froze dumbfounded. What can he do all on his own? Should he run? Should he stay? There were so many thoughts that just didn’t make any sense. No matter how he had looked at this situation, he was on his own. After a while, he went outside and did the only thing he knew to do as of late, train. Trying to take his mind off this through exercises the giant and the soldiers had thought him.

A faint sharp pitched snap followed by the sound of an arrow approaching startled Hippos. Turning around the arrow passed before his eyes before plunging itself into the ground. Hippos started running towards a shield, throwing himself after it, picking it, rolling and finally on a bend knee, shield up to protect from another projectile, he sits there for a second. Then carefully peaking over the shield he sees Adpetentia running towards him laughing. His reaction was one of shock, before he got to even snap out of it, she tackled him. With her on top, smiling, she wishes him a happy birthday. A tradition brought by the Romans to Greece, one of the few things the Greeks actually appreciated about the Roman Empire. With many still, of course, thinking that it’s a pagan tradition that defies the gods. Hippos had forgotten about his own birthday, now he was finally six years old. The giant had left to go pick up his cake, and to gift him some more time with his love. Because he knew, something was coming, he knew that disaster was upon Creetus. History was about to be written.

And in Rome

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