WHY IS IT THAT I GOT THIS NEWS JUST NOW? WHY DID IT GET US WEEK TO FIND OUT ABOUT THIS? WHOSE JOB WAS IT TO KEEP IN TOUCH AND KEEP AN EYE OVER THOSE DAMN GREEKS? Augustus screamed and asked in his frustration. The room was silent. I ASKED YOU ALL A QUESTION!!! ANSWER ME! None of them had the courage to say anything or even look him in the eye. As Olanus was late, he had asked the Caesar to calm down and explain the situation again. Dear friend, maybe you can answer me this. Looking at Olanus with a need for a satisfactory answer. It looks like, the Greeks rebelled against us, killing our troops and our emissary there. Then they had the guts, to masquerade as them… THAT WAS WEEKS AGO. Augustus shouted again at his generals. Now, if you can tell me who was responsible for watching over the Greeks and why we only got news of what happened now, that’s be lovely.
The room was quite quiet, tension in the air, only Olanus’s footsteps echoing through the room as he was pacing thinking for an answer. The Caesar sitting down, head in his hands, waiting for his answer. But Olanus knew the dangers of answering stupidly to Augustus, so he was taking his sweet time. And Augustus trusted in Olanus, he was one of the few people that got his patience. ENOUGH! This sparked his neurons, giving him the perfect answer. I think I know what happened. Everyone was now listening carefully to Olanus, waiting for his answer. I was supposed to oversee the Greeks after the glorious battle of Actium, but you chose to keep me by your side instead, thus betraying my no good brother. And if I am not mistaken you put your old friend Bigus Dicus in charge. The room almost burst out into laughter, but Augustus wasn’t pleased. Furious at their reaction, Augustus raises out of his chair, and goes around to his generals. Do you think this is funny? To make mockery of my dear friend, Bigus Dicus. You… Do you still find the need to giggle when I mention my friend Bigus Dicus? Cheeks were puffed and red all over the room, tears rolling down their faces as they forced themselves not to laugh, since they all found it risible.
Olanus calms the Caesar down after a while, with Augustus now collected the meeting continued. Right, you are right. I will personally look to executing that fool. He made a mockery of Rome and I won’t stand for it. We need to send troops there now! And send orders to the rest of our legions in Greece and Macedon to stay on guard for any other potential uprisings from the plebs. Because this means war against all of Greece and Bigus Dicus! Proud he left the room and everyone started laughing uncontrollably.
And in Greece
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